An Automated Christmas...
‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house.
Not a creature was stirring, not even electron’s mouse.
I bypassed my interior motion sensors on the security system with care.
In hopes that St Nicholas would soon be there.
No one on-line as all the Cocooners were nestled all snug in their beds.
While visions of new Elk M1 Gold units danced in their heads.
Seems one of my switches blew an exterior light after giving it a tap.
But it’s Christmas, so I’m not going to post a thread giving that vendor a bad rap!
Just then the security system tripped, sounding the sirens with such clatter.
I sprang from the bed with my shotgun to see what was the matter.
I disarmed the system so quick in a flash.
Trying to keep the WAF up so she won’t give my system a bash.
I gazed into the monitor to view my IR camera which was outdoors in the snow.
But due to its poor resolution I couldn’t make out the objects below.
When what to my wondering eyes should appear.
But it was Spanky and some Elk employees all dressed as reindeer!
With him was Dean of CQC, so lively and quick,
Also there were two others of HomeSeer, hey its Rich and Rick!
Spanky called them all over by name.
And I started to wonder the meaning of this game.
This was quite a mixed group, all of them having successful products and fame.
Spanky said we are all creating a unique product, but haven’t decided on its name.
It will integrate “everything”, but I know you will need some convincin’.
So we are here to tell you exactly what we are a fixen’.
This product will incorporate touch screens on the wall.
And also integrate wirelessly to cell phones that you can call.
It will integrate all you want, we feel you will want to buy,
At least one unit so you can do a How-To so others will give it a try.
I exclaimed, “Will this product finally do analog inputs too?”
Spanky replied, “Yes BSR, we did that just for you!”
I said, “Man if it also does timers like the Ocelot, I’m going to hit the roof!”
Spanky said, I tried BSR but those ADI people are pretty aloof.
But we think this new product will have you coming around.
It even has a new voice interface; you will like this new sound!
Just then Rich, Rick and Dean impatiently tapped one foot.
And I was curious why their clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot.
Seems that Spanky “removed” the product from the lab, saying I’m going to test this and give it right back.
He was the first to turn it on, but it didn’t work till he gave it a whack!
But it didn’t have the correct version of the plugins, oh-oh this was getting hairy.
Then it blew up, but hey it was a prototype so it shouldn’t stop them from getting it cherry.
Then the four of them pulled an all nighter to get it to go.
Turned out it was a bad diode that was stopping the whole show!
They wanted it done by Christmas and the deadline caused them to grit their teeth
But they got it all to work using a part from an old kit from Heath.
This product will also do home theater using an interface you can view on the ‘telly.
Plus its speed will make other systems look like they are operating in a bowlful of jelly.
Then out in the background, I saw Guy Lavoie dressed as an elf.
I would not have believed this if I hadn’t seen it for myself.
My ‘idol’ gave a wink of his eye and twist of his head,
And said, "BSR this system will give something for all other vendors to dread."
"It will interface UPB, Insteon, and Z-Wave; and, yes this was a lot of work.
But the system works flawlessly, without one single quirk."
I just couldn’t believe what was happening in front of my nose.
I MUST be dreaming, hey someone water me down with a hose.
But just then I heard someone shouting and giving me a whistle.
Then I realized I was lying down outside in some thorns and thistle.
Seems this WAS just a dream I was having while I was unconscious during the night.
Because I fell from my ladder while trying to change that burnt out exterior light!
Merry Christmas all from BSR :lol:
