hey Jim,
This is a loaded question, and the answer will depend on some of your requirements. But the good news is, with products such as Home Assistant, you can mix & match.
If you're starting fresh, or can ramp up slowly, I'd look at ZigBee devices which are upgradable to Matter (such as the Philips Hue product line), although I don't consider Matter to be stable enough just yet. Personally I'm a big fan of Z-Wave, just because it works better for me. The Z-Wave certification also makes the ecosystem a little bit more robust since it's backwards compatible, and the Z-Wave certification does mean a basic functionality which should just work.
Z-Wave devices tend to be more expensive, unless you wait for a good deal, or focus on certain brands such as Zooz (manufactured/sold by
TheSmartestHouse.com).
Now, if you're considering Z-Wave, you need to be somewhat mindful of the chipset of the device. Ideally, you want devices which support the S2 security protocol (part of Z-Wave Plus). The latest gen of the Z-Wave chipset is the 800 series, which supports
Long Range, and would be the most future-proof choice. The USB interface, which works with Home Assistant, is pretty
cheap. But 800-series hardware selection is limited as it's relatively new (again Zooz to the rescue). The good news is that you a Z-Wave 800 series controller can manage old devices just fine. If you have a list of devices, we can take a closer look.
Just keep in mind when dealing with mesh networks, you need proper coverage in order for this to succeed, so you'll need devices which can act as repeater (any Z-Wave device powered by mains, not battery) all over the house.
As for WiFi based devices, SonOff and Tuya are pretty popular choices.
@pete_c can provide you with more details, but it may be worth starting a dedicated thread for this. Just keep in mind that all this WiFi chatter may affect your wireless network performance, so it really depends on your environment.
ESP32s are a lot of fun, so many things you can do with them, and rather easy if you use something like ESPHome (an add-on for Home Assistant). You can also use it for presence detection, Bluetooth proxy, I/O monitoring/control, etc.
But with Home Assistant, you can keep using X10, while testing all these new technologies.
Note: I'm a big fan of The Smartest House, which is a US-based business which also sells Z-Wave hardware under their Zooz brand, so you may see me referencing them a couple of times. The shop reminds me of Automated Outlet back in the days. I doubt they even know about this site, and there's no advertising/affiliate linking, but I'm a big fan of their customer service and their expertise, available via phone.