self destruct

[signal15]

A friend and I were talking tonight, and determined that the ELK is the perfect platform for a self destruct feature. You could use a keyfob to execute a task, that task would look something like this:

Whenever Task 01 executes
 then announce vm250 (self destruct sequence activated)
 then turn on output 9 (solenoid gas valve) for 30 minutes
Whenever output 9 turns off
 Then turn on output 10 (toaster filled with newspaper)
Whenever keyfob button 1 press is activated
 then execute task 01

Just remember, it's not good technology unless you can do something really evil with it.

 

[gatchel]

I love that feature. If you have someone you want to off, all you have to do is install a "free" alarm system just like they show on TV.

 

[tmbrown97]

Careful - such public postings can be found and used against you by your insurance company or the authorities during the investigation into the fire that happens in your home while you're out of town.

and yes, it'd work

 

[signal15]

Careful - such public postings can be found and used against you by your insurance company or the authorities during the investigation into the fire that happens in your home while you're out of town.

and yes, it'd work

The fire investigators they send are usually DAMN good at figuring out where a fire started. Unless there was some conspiracy to screw you, I highly doubt you would be blamed for installing a gas solenoid valve and a toaster filled with newspaper. Now, provided that those things WERE found in your house, you might have some explaining to do.

My buddy's house in Vegas burned down a couple of years ago. There was *nothing* left. 3 people on his street had burned their houses down over the years and been caught, so they blamed him for burning his own house down. They brought in the fire investigators. They determined the location the fire started, determined it was a Glade air freshener candle that had burned to the bottom of the glass container, and determined how the container broke and which direction it sent burning wax, and what it landed on. They found all of the glass pieces among the wreckage and put it all back together. Interestingly enough, there was a warning sticker on the bottom of the candle that said "Caution, glass may explode". This sticker apparently was not enough to save Glade from a lawsuit from the insurance company.

After seeing what the investigators did to reconstruct how his house was burned down, I'm of the opinion that you would be a damn fool to attempt to burn your own house down. You'd be a damn fool anyway, but ultimately, you'd be a damn fool that gets caught.

I do wish I lived in the middle of nowhere though. Doing a mythbusters style self destruct on a cheap plywood shed in the middle of a field might be a lot of fun.

 

[BraveSirRobbin]

After seeing what the investigators did to reconstruct how his house was burned down, I'm of the opinion that you would be a damn fool to attempt to burn your own house down. You'd be a damn fool anyway, but ultimately, you'd be a damn fool that gets caught.

Unless you use a Glade air freshener candle!

 

[signal15]

After seeing what the investigators did to reconstruct how his house was burned down, I'm of the opinion that you would be a damn fool to attempt to burn your own house down. You'd be a damn fool anyway, but ultimately, you'd be a damn fool that gets caught.

Unless you use a Glade air freshener candle!

Interestingly enough, when you're done burning those Glade candles like my buddy, your house REALLY does not smell so nice. I don't who's idea it was at Glade for Charcoal/formaldehyde scent, but it was a bad choice.

 

[hucker]

I don't do the self destruct thing, but prior to my alarm going off I play sounds of doors creeking, dogs walking on wood floors and finally a shot gun cocking noise...followed by the alarm going off. Good fun.

I also modified it for when we were on vacation and the neighbors came over to feed the cats... I played sounds of my kids saying their names quietly... Icalled them that night and asked if they thought our house was haunted. I got a bigger kick out of it than they did

 

[zpollock]

I also modified it for when we were on vacation and the neighbors came over to feed the cats... I played sounds of my kids saying their names quietly... Icalled them that night and asked if they thought our house was haunted. I got a bigger kick out of it than they did

That's so wrong... I love it!

 

[jhdale]

I don't do the self destruct thing, but prior to my alarm going off I play sounds of doors creeking, dogs walking on wood floors and finally a shot gun cocking noise...followed by the alarm going off. Good fun.

I also modified it for when we were on vacation and the neighbors came over to feed the cats... I played sounds of my kids saying their names quietly... Icalled them that night and asked if they thought our house was haunted. I got a bigger kick out of it than they did

Now that we're drifting away from the insurance fraud topic....

I routinely use my system to announce system self-destruct, make explosion noises, activate strobe lights, and fire vulcan machine guns (made by Nerf). But then, I use my system primarily for a live-action roleplaying game, not home automation.

 

[GraysonPeddie]

You guys just made me laugh so hard and so long scrolling all the way down in this thread that I am almost about to fall off the chair.

Too hilarious... *nuts*

But it's still not funny, by the way.

 

[tmbrown97]

So off-topic, but Hucker - I gotta hear that... I'm going on vacation relatively soon and have family taking care of the cats/house... I'd love to have a little fun with them...

If you can share, PM me.