The ELK isn't particularly awesome at home automation, the programming stuff is too limited. That said, I just moved and just ordered another one today. It's the most flexible security system I've ever used, and it integrates well with the Vera (which I use for Home Automation logic as it integrates with the Elk). Even if you don't use it for HA, it's a great product.
As far as lighting goes, if you're building a new house, put in centralized lighting. The house I just bought has an old LiteTouch system in it that was installed 18 years ago. It was $40k back then. I thought I'd hate it, I ended up loving it after I fixed all of the worn out buttons. It's got scenes on the buttons, so I can press one button and it lights every light in the path from the bedroom to the kitchen. It's got built in scheduling. I can press one button and shut off all of the lights in the house when I go to bed. But, you don't need to spend $40k to get centralized lighting. A Centralite Elegance XL system is WAY less money, probably comparable to outfitting your house with a ton of UPB or other communicating switches. And, IMO, it's better quality.
I wrote a plugin for LiteTouch to use it with the Vera, so now I have full control of all of my lighting anywhere in the world through the phone, and I can control my lighting with home automation logic. As an example, the kids open their bedroom door at night, it will turn on the hall an bathroom lights really low for them, and back off again when the door closes.